04 November, 2009

Think Geek, baby. I may or may not be a genius, but I am a master procrastinator

Really, do I even need to write anything with a title like that?

If you've never spent a lovely hour online wandering around on the Think Geek website, I would recommend a hasty removal from this waste of space to the aforementioned site. (not that I really have to tell anyone to do this. No one has read this blog, except myself, and I already spent a good 20 minutes on Think Geek the other day.) They have the most fantastic posters, made to look like office inspirational posters - you know what I mean, the kind that say things like "teamwork" and "leadership" under a picture of a lighthouse or the grand canyon or something impressive. The "procrastination" one is pretty sweet. Check them out.

Some other cool things they have:
• Deluxe jedi robes
• Good Morning, Sir Alarm (it ought to be "alarum") clock, which wakes you with recordings of that gentleman's gentleman, Jeeves, saying things like," It is time to face the day. Shall I cancel you appointments and book a hotel for a month in Seychelles? Very good, Sir." I do not believe there could be a better way to be awakened of a chilly morning. Unfortunately, it's 70 bucks.
• A light-up wi-fi detecting shirt. I can’t do this one full justice. It’s amazing.
• A laptop sleeve made to look like a “my documents” folder
• The Think Geek 8 bit tie
• And a Dread Pirate Roberts action figure

I’ve never seen such a collection of interesting items in one place. Every new page brings forth another merchandise marvel. I would buy a lot of it, if I had any moolah. But it’s fun looking around on the site even without sweet moolah, because the product descriptions are hilarious. I’ll probably get sued for doing this, but here is just an example of their fabulous “product information” on a particularly great t-shirt. And this isn’t even their best.

Here at ThinkGeek we're pretty lazy when it comes to technology. We expect our gadgets to do all the busywork while we focus on the high level important tasks like reading blogs. That's why we hate to have to crack open our laptops just to see if there is any wi-fi internet access about... and keychain wi-fi detectors, we would have to actually remove them from our pockets to look at them. But now thanks to the ingenious ThinkGeek robot monkeys you can display the current wi-fi signal strength to yourself and everyone around you with this stylish Wi-Fi Detector Shirt. The glowing bars on the front of the shirt dynamically change as the surrounding wi-fi signal strength fluctuates. Finally you can get the attention you deserve as others bow to you as their reverential wi-fi god, while geeky chicks swoon at your presence. You can thank us later.
All this to say, I like to waste time. I’m very good at it. Why I need to be writing a blog at all – and one (mainly) about being idle – is a good question. I waste enough time as it is. But you know what? I like wasting time. So there.

P.S. Confession: the reason I am wasting time here is because I don’t want to work on my mythology test. On Thursday, we get our mythology papers - short stories about "mother earth" - back, and I’m terrified.  I’ve never written a short story IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. So, understandably, I’m a bit apprehensive. The reason I’m not doing my test (which, mercifully is a take-home) is because some part of my brain is telling me that if I put it off it will feel like the due date (Thursday) is further away. And if Thursday feels further away, my impending paper-results doom will feel further away. That’s logic.


  1. I have to admit, you have a very high talent for procrastinating. That, playing ukulele, and rearranging your room every other day.

    -Your "Sickeningly Musical" Sis

  2. Thank you m'dear. With a pompous grin and in a Hercule Poirot voice - Oui, mon ami (or, I suppose amie in this case), I have indeed a great talent for the procrastinating as you call it.