Celebrities I have... met.

Last night I dreamed Leonardo DiCaprio was my adopted brother, and I decided to take him a bunch of places so people would be all excited that he was there and wouldn't notice that I was late, had done no work, or was doing no work.  He was basically the answer to all of my slacker problems.

Which has made me notice something.  I think I might have a lot of dreams with famous people in them. Or, at least, more than a person might ordinarily have.
In dreams, I've also met Jennifer Lawrence (we were close friends, actually), Karlie Kloss, the band The Wombats, and Tom Hanks.  My sister dreams that Tom Hanks is our uncle all the time (he looks like he could be anyone's uncle, which is part of what makes him great), but she has not had the serious bonding time I've had with Jen.

In the first Jennifer Lawrence dream, we were messing around downtown where we rode an elevator that was deeply unsafe and more like a ride from the fair.  We talked about how she had found out he was going to play Katniss while cleaning up a mess on the floor at my house. We also went to a PetSmart, which, peculiarly, had beverages for sale - like a whole wall of glass containers like at a gas station - and Jennifer explained to me that there was some kind of margarita mix/juice that was delicious without the alcohol that she and her brothers had discovered and it was only sold at PetSmart.  I was sitting on the floor, laughing unhelpfully. In the back of my mind I had a feeling that she was going to offer me pot, and I thought, "Well, if Jennifer Lawrence offers it to me, I'm going to take it."  But I woke up before she could.

In the second, she was getting ready for a premier and I discovered that all her jewelry was like the plastic kiddy kind you buy at Rite-Aid, hooked onto little cardboard hangers. I thought, "Wow! Smart.  No one would notice."

P.S. I have actually met Shia LaBeouf at a Six Flags (during his Even Stevens days), and Jump5 back when they were a thing, and I sat one chair away from a very bearded Jason Schwartzman this past summer in a hip vegan restaurant. None of those encounters were anywhere near as good as being Jen's bestie, I have to admit.

P.P.S Last night (1.10.14) I dreamed I was dressed in some sort of period costume (may have been Jane Austen-ish)(all the ladies had mason jars of yogurt that matched the color of their dresses), and there was some odd sort of choice-making ceremony in which I was picked by chance to be the future bride of this snippy jerk.  And after responding to a moronic comment he made about how I'd arranged some strawberries on a plate, I turned to serve some of the strawberries to the woman to the left of me. It was Emma Thompson. She was rather professor Trelawney-ish, and as she dithered about I gently plopped strawberries on the side of her plate, which was already quite filled up with long, thin, curly shreds of peeled carrot. I really can't explain it.

1.28.14  
Jennifer Lawrence and I went skiing.  I tried to make excuses because it looked cold out, but once I got out there I enjoyed it.
Later, some smallish polar bears sort of genteelly attacked my car, and I gave them dove chocolates to make them not eat me.

the real question is, will I ever write a post that is actually about something?

Hello!  It's been a while, hasn't it?

1. Okay, this house is so distracting.  I get almost nothing done.  The apartment was so depressing that you had to get out and do things and go the library all the time for the sake of your sanity.  Now I just sit on the deck and maybe play ukulele and wham-o! All the sudden it's eleven thirty and my teeth aren't even brushed for pete's sake!

2. There are a zillion things I would like to take pictures of in the yard and house and boast about on here, but it's eleven thirty and I'm too tired.

3. Again, this house is distracting.  I don't even want to watch movies anymore.  Or, if I do, I have to wait till it's really dark or the bugs are snacking on me rather too greedily.  I want to be outside all the time.

4. However, Cee and I went and saw Captain America the other day and shrieked for a bit afterwards.  I'm taking dad to see it this weekend, hopefully.  We can't pin down exactly why it was so enjoyable.  I think because the main guy wasn't a jerk.  In a lot of other hero movies the guy has to learn to be good.  You like him in spite of yourself because he's funny, but you know he's a turd.  Captain America was a nice, honorable guy from the get-go.

5.  I don't know why, but when I see actors from, like, a Poirot TV movie or BBC mini-series on the big, big screen, I feel ridiculously proud and happy.  I whacked poor Cee in the arm twice during Captain America for Richard Armitage (the tooth-cruncher) and JJ Feild (the British guy in the bad-guy's-lair-demo-team).  I also sort of whispered in a very shrill voice, "Richard Armitage is going to be Thorin in The Hobbit! Augh! But doesn't he seem way tall?"  I know, I know, they'll make him look shorter.  But I just can't see it right now. He just is tall in my head.  JJ Feild I knew as Simon Doyle in Death on the Nile.   He was  good in that, actually.  Rather the way I always saw the character in my head.

6.  I stayed up till two watching Wives and Daughters the other night.  I am more than ever convinced that all British actors must all know each other.  I mean, just one example:  Keely Hawes (Cynthia Kirkpatrick) is married to Matthew MacFadyen.  They met through MI-5.  He played Mr. Darcy in the new Pride and Prejudice - along with Rosamund Pike and Tom Hollander, who were both in Wives and Daughters as well.  And remember that Poirot I talked about?  Well,  Barbara Flynn (Miss Browning of Wives and Daughters) was also in it with Emily Blunt, who was in The Young Victoria with Rupert Friend who dated Keira Knightley for forever.  And Keira Knightley was in Pride and Prejudice with both Rosamund Pike and Tom Hollander.  I mean!  And I've been talking about fairly obvious examples involving big-name people who do franchises and big-screen stuff.  Don't even get me started on the people who rotate through all the Masterpiece Theatre movies.  If the Masterpiece Theatre people don't exchange Christmas cards and go to each others' kids' birthday parties, I would eat a soft hat if I owned one.

7.  I am, obviously, the logic master of the world.  See #6 for proof, baby.

8. Also, I am great because I took the time to put all the movie titles in italics.

9. I need to go to bed.  Several times today I found myself trying to stuff my purse into the refrigerator.

10. Good night.

Jumpology

"When you ask a person to jump, his attention is mostly directed toward the act of jumping, and the mask falls, so that the real person appears."

Buddy Holly

Why: He had a charming head, and wrote lots of very catchy songs like, "Everyday."  He also was a big influence for the young Beatles.  That's a solid reason to be grateful that someone existed right there.

I would like to emulate this famous person's creativity and style.  I like the funny way he sings.  I also like his teeth, though I already emulate him in that area. 

famous people I am fond of

Have recently been doodling pictures of people I admire.  I'm igeneration, I will share.  I'm also going to say why I like the person.

William Shakespeare

Why:  He wrote stuff like "two star-cross'd lovers, take their life" "Oh brave new world" and other similarly famous and pleasant things.  He wrote characters like King Lear and Hamlet that are difficult and interesting. He wrote plays, like Twelfth Night, which are funny.  Also, reading his work is rather challenging, which makes it more fun when you get it.  Also, when you get it, you can feel very superior and mock actors who obviously don't understand what they're saying.

I would like to emulate this famous person's writing skills.  I would like to be able to understand the human mind as well as he seemed to do.  I would also like to be good at poetry.

well, I don't like your tie.

I'm kind of insane for the Beatles right now. (If an imaginary reader gets the reference in the title, they win a prize! So! I offer lots of non-existant prizes to non-existant readers, don't I?)
Recently, I've found myself listening to them more and more.  And playing them pitifully on my dear ukulele.  (By the way, in a recent issue of Time, they had an article about how a big ukulele renaissance is taking place right now.  People are buying them in droves because it makes them feel good when they play. Also, it makes them super cool.  I am so ahead of the times! Har har! Bad pun!)
I'm reading this massive biography of the group by Bob Spitz. I feel like I'm going to get into one of my obsessive reading cycles.  A year or two ago I read every Audrey Hepburn biography in the San Diego County Library system.  Every one.  It was the same story every time, but I still read them all.  For a while, I also read books exclusively on parakeets.  My gosh, I'm insane or something.
But, anyways.
The Beatles are fantastic.  It's just weird.  How are they that great.  How?  I just don't get it.  Magic. What would today's music be like if we hadn't had them?
Sigh, sigh.  I'm wandering all over the place, and should probably delete all this.  Oh well.

In other news, mom went out and measured the thickness of the snow outside.  Six inches.  This is our third batch of snow.  I'm beginning to feel suspicious of all the people who told us it snowed only one day here -"Barely enough to whiten the ground! Ha-ha!"  Those people also said the summers only got into the 90's.  I'm probably exaggerating, but I think we had a month of days over 100 degrees.  I'm not complaining (hey, I got three days of work and school this week - I'm not complaining AT ALL), just pointing out the discrepancies here.

So, how did I spend this snow day?  Not going outside, that's for sure!
No, I spent the day becoming painfully aware of how unmusical I am.  I decided, all fired up from this Beatlemania thing I'm going through, to write a song.   Here's how the day panned out:

Writing easy, almost asinine lyrics ("you" rhymed with "do" at least twice, etc.): 1 hour
Figuring out chords: 4 hours (no joke.)
Recording: 2 hours
Total: 7 hours, for one idiotic song.

I don't think I'm going to be the next Lennon-McCartney.
But, hey, I enjoyed myself.  And I've got a pathetic little song to show for the day.

That's all that's going on with me at the moment.  I'm doing good.

Goodnight, dear void.

keywords: rant/rave/superheroes

Peer editing is a delightful way to spend one's time, is it not?

NOT! NOT! NOT!  PEER EDITING IS HORRIFYING! UGH!

Now that I've got that off my chest, let's talk about superheroes.  Why, you may ask, am I talking about superheroes?  Because, my dear blog, I have been wallowing in a veritable... a veritable... vat of toxic waste which the villain intends to drop the screeching heroine into with a satisfying sizzle.

Wait, that didn't make sense.

Okay, we are discussing superheroes because in the past week I have seen:

Batman Begins

The Dark Knight

Spider Man

X-Men Origins: Wolverine

and

X-Men

Yep.  In fact, I watched the last three with my sister yesterday.  And the only film among these that I had seen before - eons ago - was Spider Man.  

HOW THE HECK HAVE YOU NEVER SEEN BATMAN!? You might reasonably shriek.

And I would have to answer, in a calm, collected tone of voice, that I have no idea.  But, I am an odd child that way.  I had my first pumpkin pie last year.  I can't explain it.

But, anyways, let's move back to superheroes. 

THOUGHTS ABOUT THE MOVIES I RECENTLY WATCHED:

1. Batman. Is. Awesome.  He probably tops the favorite superhero list.  And, my heavens, those movies were done well. Michael Caine! Morgan Freeman!  Christian Bale!  Heath Ledger!  Oh, man.  I thought his put-on batman voice would annoy me - ended up totally cool with it.  The gadgets or whatever are believable.  Think how terribly, terribly wrong they could have gone with the bat mobile.   Granted, the Rachel switch was weird.  But still - ah! 

2. No matter how cheesy, I will still always like spider man.  I like Tobey  Maguire.  I love how awkward he is.  James Franco seems to be on the verge of tears in every movie I've ever seen him in - yet I still like him too.  The Green Goblin costume was wretched, yes.  Special effects decidedly 2002 at points.  But I still enjoyed it.  We're getting spider-man 2 from Netflix.  Alfred Molina seems to enjoy himself, doesn't he?  He chooses all these wacky roles, but performs them with such gusto that you can't think badly of him. 

3. X-Men.  X-Men.  X-Men.  

I don't even know what to say.  I am an extreme hater of leather jumpsuits or pants or anything besides modest jackets, and I still loved the movies. (And, believe me, I've hated movies for less than unfortunate pleather episodes.)  I found myself smacking Cee (my sister) about every ten minutes, shrieking quietly, "Did he kill her?  Is he going to kill her?" and "It's that thing! That blue girl is the statue of liberty." and "Tell me when to open my eyes." Oh my gosh. I am (cough) very rarely (suave brush of nails against shoulder) surprised by film plots (subtle puffing of chest) - and I didn't see some things coming in these movies.  It's terribly exciting.

EFFECT OF THIS SUPERHERO MOVIE OVERLOAD:

I want to be a superhero. I'm dead serious.  I wish I was disgustingly rich and brilliant and slightly unprincipled and not afflicted with chronic laziness.  I wish I liked working out and getting punched in the face. I wish I lived in a major city.  I wish I had a vast collection of ridiculously expensive gadgets at my command, or could shoot string out my wrists. I wish I was a master of the one-liner. Gosh, I wish I could be a superhero.  Despised by the people I have my nose regularly bloodied to save!  Feared by small children whose mothers tell them I will come get them if they don't brush their teeth right now!  And, deep down, content in the knowledge that I am working to rid my beloved city of sweatshirted thieves and making it a better place!  I so wish I could be a superhero. Or at least be saved by one. 

I watch far too many adventure movies.  It makes me discontent, and I start ranting to my poor dad about how you can't just take a canoe and go glide down a river and camp out wherever you want to anymore.  (These subjects - superheroes and canoes - are related, I swear.  At least, they are in a rather vague way in my head. So probably they are not really related at all.  Sorry.) I fret that life is too tame, too regulated.  I start to moan to myself that I'll never get to have any adventures, conveniently forgetting that Frodo almost goes nuts and dies.  Conveniently forgetting that getting horrible scars actually hurts.  Conveniently forgetting that being a superhero would basically be awful. 

Still...


X-Men 2 arrives in three business days.

Okay, slightly embarrassing...

Once upon a time, during a sleepover with a friend - gosh, ages ago now - we were chatting about crushes.  Well, actually, her crushes.  I said I didn't have any, which I realize now was entirely untrue.  I was too narrow, I thought having a "crush" meant actually liking a real person.  My dear friend, I deceived you.  I've had a crush on at least one person per year since the age of ten.  And, as penance, I will list them now.

10: Robin Hood

Why: Good tempered, funny, amazing archery skills, cool hat, and he's Robin Hood. 

11: Donald O'Conner (in Singin' In the Rain)

Why: The man is hilarious.  And he can run up a wall and do a backflip.  And can he dance.

12: Gene Kelly (also in Singin' in the Rain)

Why: He can dance (which feels like the understatement of the century, and probably is) and sing.

13: Prince Philip

Why: There are so many reasons. He dances, he sings, he rides an awesome horse, he has a sense of humor and the best hat ever, he actually does something scary and difficult to save dumb Beauty (he fights a dragon, for heaven's sake!) and he lives in a world where the bushes are squared.  I love him the best of all. 

14: Cary Elwes (In The Princess Bride)

Why: Because he's funny, can sword fight, has a mustache and puts up with stupid buttercup so nicely.

15: Mr. Darcy - Matthew Mcfadyen (in Pride and Prejudice) like every other teenage girl on earth

Why: He has an incredible speaking voice.  Like, amazing.  Plus, he looked decidedly tall in that movie. (Who knows how tall he is in real life.  Thankfully, I seldom deal with real life.)  And around that time I'd suddenly grown about six inches, so it was convenient.

16: Morhange (Les Choristes)

Why: Can the kid sing. Plus he's French, which is cool.  And still living, which is a bonus. A little troubled, which worried me, but at the time  I didn't care.  I'm sorry to say this attachment was somewhat short-lived.  Because:

17: Gregory Peck (In Roman Holiday) came along.

Why:  Just because.  He really needs no explanation.  Probably learning that he pretended to have his hand chopped off during the mouth of truth scene to spook Audrey Hepburn started it.  Any guy who would do that is cool. 

18: Peter O'Toole (in How to Steal a Million and real life)

 Why: He's unny, funny, funny. Gorgeous, smart in real life, won't mind if you accidentally shoot him, will help you burglarize museums. 

19: Cary Grant (in everything)

Why: sense of humor, for a short period of life worked as an acrobat in the circus, accent, general wonderfulness.

And who knows what my twenties will bring.

So there you are, friend of long ago.  The truth at last.

(P.S.  I do have crushes on regular people who are alive.  I just don't advertise them.  And I always know in my heart that Philip is ten million times better than any of them, so I never like them that much anyways. No point getting silly about people when I know I'm not ready to be silly forever, is there? And besides that, they're all shorter than me.  Which is a no-no.)

23 June:
Okay, I officially figured out who the crush of my twentieth year of life will be:

Jimmy Stewart.  Yep.
That's all I have to say.

"There is a gigantic difference between earning a great deal of money and being rich."

The Great Kate

I can't help myself, I have to post.
Last night I watched Holiday, starring Katharine Hepburn and Cary Grant.  My second official Katharine Hepburn movie.  I saw Brining Up Baby the other day, on a recommendation from a friend and was completely enchanted.  I already adored Cary Grant - have for a few years now, since I saw Charade. My poor future spouse. With a wife who's been in love with Cary Grant since age 15, and, circa 2001, worshiped Gene Kelly  and Donald O'Connor (the man could run up walls and do backflips! Any eleven year old could loose her heart to him.), he will have a lot to live up to.
Katharine Heburn is, officially, a new movie idol. I am dying to have her accent.

"Looks like me."

Wait, what?!

My hometown pride has just been upped about ten thousand points.
Gregory Peck - let me say that again - GREGORY PECK was born in SAN DIEGO, California. My town! My place of birth!

 We San Diegans are a classy lot.

He went to High School next to Balboa Park, and then attended - get this - SDSU for a year, finishing school at Berkley.  How weird is that?!  SDSU!

This happy discovery prompted a search - again on Wikipedia, that blessed site - through their list of San Diegans to find other actors of note.  (i.e. ones I've heard of.)

  

I was delighted, overjoyed, to discover that Robert Duvall was born here as well.  That's something to be proud of.  Cameron Diaz is less thrilling, but hey, if I ever get famous we'll at least have something in common to talk about at the Vanity Fair party.  Better than nothing, right? A little ice-breaker? (Edit: Though, now that I think on it, I'm not sure I would want to talk to Cameron Diaz at parties.  What if someone took a picture of the revoltingly slender, fit, well-manicured, perfectly made up and coifed woman while I was standing next to her?  I don't think my self-confidence could take it.  I'm sure she's sweet and funny and that we would become total besties, but I would never be able to stand next to her without feeling a slobby, ill-dressed and manicured blimp.  Sorry Cam - our friendship will have to be strictly limited to texting only.  ttyl)

  

Mostly, depressingly, the notable thespians relating to my fair hometown are people like Adam Brody and Autumn Reeser, Mario Lopez and Jason Earles who may be huge within their fan base, but don't really thrill non-O.C. watching, pre-Saved by the Bell, Hannah haters like me.  There are a lot of people like Marion Ross, maths-touting Danica McKellar and - to a lesser degree - Nakia Burrise, etc., who are all known for one role they played on, like, Happy Days for eight thousand years and nothing else.  (It was Power Rangers for Burrise. No offense to any Rangers fans out there, but I think Happy Days probably was a more challenging gig than shouting things like, "it's Morphin' time!"  Thus, "to a lesser degree".)  The mean popular guy Mandy Moore likes in the first Princess Diaries movie - Zach or Ethan or whatever -  who, incidentally, voiced Sid in the first Toy Story, possibly the scariest villain ever to blow things up while cackling malevolently in the history of the entire world - was born in old SD as well.
But, honestly, I don't care very much.
There are also a few people - Harold Lloyd for instance (moved here as a kid), who, according to Wikipedia,  "ranks alongside Charlie Chaplin and Buster Keaton as one of the most popular and influential film comedians of the silent film era" - who I feel I ought to have heard of before, but haven't.

Yep.  Never seen him before.

In some ways, reading about dozens of very mildly successful careers - the variety most of San Diego's talent has boasted - is depressing.  SD is the ninth largest city in the U.S. - you'd think we would have produced more quality talent.  Puny half-dead industrial towns in England boast more thespians of note.
I guess it makes sense - when held up next to the states, England is comparatively compact; it shouldn't be surprising that every third actor was born in a suburb of London.  But still.  Are they hoarding the talent, or what?
Oh well. We got Gregory Peck - so na-na on you!

Later:
What have I done!?  About twenty seconds ago, I declared a fast from facebook! A fast intended to last until May 31! Am I a lunatic or something?!  I have to stay off now, because EVERYONE will know if I cheat.  Accountability, it's a terrible thing.  I wrote a "what are you thinking" or whatever it is, proclaiming my plans.  Ugh, stupid.
But right.  When you spend more time commenting with friends than talking face to face, I think there's a problem.
Aw, nuts.  Being mature is a total drag.

Later later:
feel a bit victorious.  I just deleted my Twitter account.  The darn thing is gone! Facebook will hurt, but I'm almost glad to be rid of Twitter.  I just couldn't go on writing mindless blurbs so deplorably titled "tweets".

old lang sign, my dear

Happy new year! Welcome cosmic children!

By the way, how do we say 2010?  "Twenty-ten"?  Because "two thousand ten" just sounds silly.  What about "this year of our Lord twenty twelve"?  I like that.

Okay, (this is the explanation for "cosmic children".  I don't actually say that, you know, on a regular basis.) I've watched Shrek three one too many times. For someone who declares herself decidedly not a Shrek fan, I like it a lot.  Just the third one though, not the others. No way the others.

What a day.  Last night, in semi-celebration I drank an entire bottle of Martinelli's sparkling cider (which, surprisingly, contains only 420 calories a bottle) by myself.  It was, however, like I said, a semi-celebration.  I drank the cider mainly because my wisdom teeth had been pulled the morning before and, for some unknown reason, I like a bottle of Martinelli's when I'm feeling peaky. I can't explain it. I will also never understand why, until a few years ago, whenever I felt poorly I would invariably watch Honey, I Shrunk the Kids.  Every time.  Why? What a weirdo.
For the first time in eight years, I was thoroughly sick (as in, threw up twice, which I'm sure you did not want to know) the day after the tooth-pulling.

I think I can safely say that this experience has, overall, not been pleasant.  I was almost looking forward to getting the old molars out; seriously, I was.  My sister had her wisdom teeth removed a few weeks ago and was consequently showered with love, Jamba Juice and DVD rentals.  It didn’t look like a bad gig to me.

Yesterday I wrote self-pityingly in my journal, "But now here I lie, afraid to eat anything but Saltine crackers, while my face expands like the blob.  I am not a happy camper."

Today, it's not so bad. My face is definitely not as swollen as my sister's was (wah-ha! Victory!) and I've got a whole load of DVDs to watch. It really isn't a bad gig.

To finish the story of The Happy Little Tooth:

Anyways, now that my very long tangent is over, let's talk about something else. I didn't actually intend to blab  again about the tooth-pulling.  Shareshareshare indeed.

Guess what? I have never made any new year's resolutions in my entire life.  Why?  Because I know I'm a slacker and will break them.  I also refuse to join in the resolution making because, for about four weeks around new years, all the comic strips do resolution gags. And it gets on my nerves.  I mean, it's so sappy. So, to show my resentment, I refuse to resolve. (Does that make sense? Refuse to resolve? I think it does.) See if I'm going to make myself a better person - not on your life you stupid Grand Avenue kids!  Shut up Adam at Home! Die Drabble!

Sorry, I had some anger to release there. Whoooo.

Guess what? I am going through a 90's teen comedy movie faze. How pathetic is that?  I mean, there are some great movies on Netflix instant right now, ones I've never seen - Mr. Smith Goes to Washington, On the Waterfront, Doubt - stuff I have been dying to see.  Yet here I am watching 10 Things I Hate About You, Clueless, and She's All That. What is wrong with me?

watch, like, serious movies? As if!

On a side note: When I came out of the anesthesia after the tooth-pulling, I kept trying to mutter "I coulda been a contender".  I cannot explain this.

I guess I just don't want to think at the moment.  It's so much easier watching mindless things like Clueless than tense, meaningful dramas.  Less stressful.

I also have a lot of really good books checked out from the library - On the Road, A collection of essays by Orhan Pamuk, a biography on Coco Chanel, and three books by Ian McEwan.  And yet I read my sister's Teen Vogue yesterday instead.  I learned about blogging queen Jane Aldridge, how to wear the new denim looks, and that, "Cards, candy and hearts have never been your style, but don't be surprised if this Valentine's day turns you into a believer.  Expect your most romantic year yet."  Oo, I can't wait.

I have to confess, before anyone forms any false impressions about my culture and intelligence levels, I am only reading the Orhan Pamuk because I heard Emma Thompson mention him in an interview.  See? Completely obsessed.  Could be worse though, I suppose.  I could be obsessed with, like, Jon and Kate and their will-need-serious-therapy-in-later-life Eight.

What a dull blogger I am. Oh well.

Happy New Year, dear void.

I can't think of a title that would do her justice. Truly. I tried.

What would we do without Emma Thompson?  The woman is no less than brilliant.  I want to be just like her when I grow up.
Gosh, the way she talks!  In ordinary conversation she casually tosses out these wonderful words - which, to understand, I have to furtively look up in the dictionary.  Watching interviews she's given is... is... I can't think what to say!  She makes these amazing comparisons, describes things so well that I'm afraid to describe her!  I am unworthy!
Besides that, the woman is a comic genius.  Disgustingly witty.  Best award acceptance speeches ever.  Ever. Ever. Ever. She makes me feel I ought to get up off my rear and read something. Quickly now! Up, up!

Or rent Monty Python, which, to my eternal shame, I have never seen.

I do want to be like Emma Thompson when I grow up - but I'm not sure I will actually enjoy being up when I get there.  Because, seriously now, how likely is it that I will ever have anything even a teensy bit close to Emma Thompson's brains and wit and extremely good diction.  I don't like being a grown-up nineteen year old now - what will life be like when I have to do my own taxes?  I can't bear to think about it. I'm going to be twenty soon, and I'm dreading it.  It's not like I'm afraid of getting wrinkles or dying. (I do have sort of an advantage here - my Mum doesn't have any wrinkles, and my Grandma very few, so I think it's reasonable to hope that genetics will give me a boost there. Muwahahaha.) But I am afraid, I must admit, that I might wake up (figuratively) on my death bead and realize I've wasted my life.  That would be a bummer.

Norma Jean

I saw something the other day - for the first time - which has re-ignited my determination to learn to play ukulele.

Some Like It Hot.



When she gurgled, "I play the ukulele, and I sing" I gave a loud, exultant, "AHA!" and did a fist pump.  I mean, if this does not prove that the ukulele is an awesome instrument, I don't know what could. Seriously.

I love how the girl on the right is looking straight into the camera. Glaring, really.

I found the chords for this song online; now I have only to master it and Marilyn's walk and my life will be complete.

Only recently did I see my first Marilyn Monroe film, and was amazed; She's incredibly funny. And, this is said rather grudgingly, she is gorgeous. I used to always say that I thought she looked trashy - I'm an Audrey Hepburn fan, remember. Those two women are, like, exact opposites. But you know what? When I finish an Audrey Hepburn movie, I go away telling myself I have to go on a diet. Whereas with Marilyn Monroe movies, I never feel that way. You'd think I'd be jealous of her looks, but instead, after watching her I feel sort of... empowered maybe?  It's like - just wear the most flattering clothes you can, love yourself, and then forget about it.  She's such a nice, normal size.  Refreshing, what?

A Midsummer Night's Dream. 7.

Isn't this fabulous? I am dying to see The Continuing and Lamentable Saga of the Suicide Brothers just to see it.  The sped-up, skittering thing they did with the fairy godmother looks fantastic. (FACTOID: Keira Knightley - the fairy - did all her acting and movements very slowly. When the film was sped-up, any little movements she made at normal speed looked totally inhuman.  If that makes any sense.  It's incredible, really.)
That's how I always imagine Titania looking. A bit less winter-y, but very similar. In my head, the fairies in A Midsummer Night's Dream look just like this - not a bit human.
Assuming I had a zillion dollars to toss about or some naive young producer to give it to me - because that's about how much money I'd need if I wanted to do it well - I'd love to put on a really, really good stage production of A Midsummer Night's Dream. Like, the most ethereal, fantastic Midsummer Night's Dream you can imagine. (I'd also like to see how many times I can write A Midsummer Night's Dream in one blog post. That's 5 so far.)
I recently saw the film of A Midsummer Night's Dream. Stanley Tucci (Puck) and, of course, Rupert Everett (Oberon) were good. And Michele Pfeiffer has the perfect look for Titania. But - surprise, surprise - the fairy costumes bothered me.

Hey! The Starbucks Christmas cup is in!  It's very cheery. (at right is my sloppy tribute.) I heard a man snort and mutter disgustedly in Target the other day while passing the "holiday" section. I don't like the commercialism that's been tacked on to it, but I do love Christmas.

And a Midsummer Night's Dream. 6

P.S.
Now that I know how to imbed video, the best way to explain the whole fairy stop-motion thing is not to.  A lot of this is blah blah, but at a minute 50, you see the fairy and at 2:40 or so they talk about the skittery film style.  The close-up is really neat.

FYI - I think they show a bit where the brothers spit out their own hearts.  If you're squeamish like me, this is your official warning.  I am such a wimp.  But at peace with it.